For many who chose adoption or donor conception the choice began from an initial place of loss. Unable to conceive or have a child without assistance this was the alternative. For others such as single parents and same sex couples such as myself, it is a choice that goes against ingrained societal norms of what a family looks like. 

Glen’s tears ran down his face as I told him that he wasn’t born in a prison as he believed and he was not destined to be a criminal. He had thought this for 10 years and had done everything he could to prove this was true. His Mum was in prison but I shared this didn’t mean that was his future.

12 years ago, my wife and I spent an enormous amount of time and energy finding a way that worked for us to have a baby. We are both women, we needed a sperm donor and we got undeservedly lucky both in who we chose and our beautiful child. Today our son is 12 years old and those days of anticipation, pregnancy and birth are behind us but how to weave the third person in his creation and story of his life are not.